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The Un-edited Truth of Di

Month

January 2015

Cutting Lose

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This was hilarious. Sometimes you just have to let people go. Regardless of how you feel about it

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Friendzoned!!

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Story of my life. I knew as soon as I got called “sis” it was over. The love was gone, there was no more hope. The quickest friendzone ever but so effective.

The truth

Apparently this is the week to be confronted with hard truths. Or maybe it’s the fact that I’m sleep deprived so I’m processing differently than normal. I’ve been in the valley of decision about a choice that I’ve somewhat already made. Today I talked to a friend who reminded me of the emotional side effects that would happen as a result. This information came from one of the few people on the planet who knows me well. It was good to hear someone else give their input. I like that.

Visiting others

Yesterday, someone told me that all I had to do was say the word and they would come to visit me. While normally this would be insignificant, the truth is that they were actually serious. I was very pleased by this because there are few people I know who would not only offer to get on a plane but who actually mean it. It’s a special thing that I will never take for granted. And I respect the person more because of their nice gesture. Win win for everybody.

Yesterday was good

Yesterday was a good day. Not because everything went perfectly, but because I was able to talk to some guys friends I haven’t talked to in a while. People are always wary of the genuineness of platonic opposite sex relationships but I think that they can be very eye opening. I don’t have any guy friends within 500 miles of me so it’s nice to hear familiar voices–even if it is over the phone. In one particular conversation I got challenged to see things in a different perspective. I love that because it’s helpful to get out of my own head and listen to what someone else is trying to say. Other than that, it was nice speaking to people I’ve had quality interactions with in the past. People I’ve had more than surface conversations with. I’ve grown to have a special appreciation for those times because they don’t come often.

Giving too much

First off, this post may seem a little self centered but it’s my thoughts right now. I’m a firm believer in giving and helping others. I don’t believe it should be done with ulterior motives. Yet, there are times I’ve done things for people who would never return the favor. It would be so cool to make an emotional investment and to have a return on it. There are times I just cut my losses but I wish I didn’t have to do that all the time. That there was an alternative that worked in my favor. But oh well.

Contemplation

Today was the funeral of someone I went to college with. She died unexpectedly in a car accident. While I didn’t know her well, we had a class together and were coworkers for a short period of time. She was very pleasant and nice to everyone. It’s always sobering when someone I had interactions with dies and it’s even more pronounced when the person is around my age. Life is so short. People always say that and end it with some admonition to let people know you love them while they’re still alive. I definitely agree. I myself am guilty of throwing a “love you” when what I really wanted to do was to tell the person “I love you, as in I’m in love with you.” However, I’m always so hyper aware of how that’s perceived and I like to avoid the awkward “you’re like my sister” conversation. Regardless, some things just need to be said.

Routine

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Story of my life. I love breaking up routine and doing something fun. It relaxes me and I get recharged. And by something fun I mean travel. Best thing ever.

Saying bye

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I’m in a major transition period and I have to remember this. I’ve had some hard goodbyes lately but they were needed. I have to go with what I feel to be right instead of letting emotion dictate my actions. That doesn’t make letting go any easier though.

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